When I thought of serenity, I thought of total peace, a world with no worries, and complete happiness.
Now I realize that serenity is being able to walk through challenges in life with grace and dignity. I don’t have to pick up a drink because the road is rough. I don’t have to apologize to anyone for my behavior. I don’t have to live in fear of my actions when I was drunk.
No one’s life is completely care-free. Everyone in life has to face hard times. It’s the way we face them that brings about serenity.
I know I won’t be happy all of the time, it’s not realistic. However, I have found inner strength and peace in hard times. To me, this is serenity.
When I decided to become sober, I had no serenity in my life. I was living in constant fear, keeping secrets, and always worried that someone would find out that I was drinking.
When I drank, I blacked out, and didn’t remember who I talked to, if I called someone, and what I said.
It took me a long time to find some peace in my life. For the first year of my sobriety, I was anxious and worried a lot. I went through the entire spectrum of emotions from sadness, anger, humiliation, self-hate, regret, and fear, to acceptance, forgiveness, and eventually love, and peace.
Many times I would talk about the past, and dwell on certain issues. My sponsor always said, “you wouldn’t walk into a store and ask for a calendar from 1996 would you? As far as I’m concerned, it’s all in the past.” These brilliant words of wisdom lead me out of some of my darkest moments in my early sobriety.
If I didn’t have a wise sponsor, I probably would have fallen into a pit of self-pity and eventually turn back to drinking. Now I can live my life free from alcohol, knowing that I can face any problem without a drink.
I have never experienced such profound serenity as I do now. If you are ready to walk through life without the crutch of substances, our Florida-based treatment center can help. We offer specialized programs tailored to fit each person’s individual needs.